


Haechan Cam EP 0 + 1: Meet Me And My Vampire Boyfriend

by theauthorish



Series: ChenJi's Crushes and Conundrums [4]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Dragons, M/M, Supernatural Elements, Urban Fantasy, Vampires, Youtuber AU, haechan cam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27296296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theauthorish/pseuds/theauthorish
Summary: “Hello, lovely people!” Donghyuck chirps brightly, grinning winsomely at the camera in his hand, pilfered— no, borrowed is a better word— from Jaemin’s stash. “This is Haechan from Haechan Cam with 37.5% viewer—”“What are you doing?”“Is that my camera?”“You look stupid.”Donghyuck lowers the camera to scowl at his boyfriends. “I told you I was going to get into Youtube. Shut up, Renjun, you look stupider.”
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Series: ChenJi's Crushes and Conundrums [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1915003
Comments: 8
Kudos: 104





	Haechan Cam EP 0 + 1: Meet Me And My Vampire Boyfriend

“Hello, lovely people!” Donghyuck chirps brightly, grinning winsomely at the camera in his hand, pilfered— no, _borrowed_ is a better word— from Jaemin’s stash. “This is Haechan from Haechan Cam with 37.5% viewer—”

“What are you doing?”

“Is that my camera?”

“You look stupid.”

Donghyuck lowers the camera to scowl at his boyfriends. “I told you I was going to get into Youtube. Shut up, Renjun, you look stupider.”

“Make me,” snorts Renjun, breezing past him to the kitchen, carrying a tub of some weird specialized blood ice cream. (Donghyuck has no clue how Renjun even found that shit, but he’s, like, addicted, and if it makes him happy— the joy flowing off of him in warm, summery yellow waves— and it’s being made ethically…)

“Yah, Donghyuck,” says Jaemin again. “Is that my—”

“You know it is,” Jeno answers, as Donghyuck frowns and stops recording, trashing the footage.

“You made the clip unusable! I told you I was gonna go by Haechan!” he whines. Maybe if he acts like he’s done nothing wrong, his boyfriends will play along.

...Or not.

“Good,” huffs Jaemin. “You should’ve asked permission before taking my shit.” He manages to glare for maybe half a second before he’s shrugging easily, letting it slide as he always does. “But yeah, sure, use it. Just—” he points a stern finger at Donghyuck, though his every gesture sings of fondness, shades of rose and faded red. “Make sure you take care of it. If you break it, you’re buying me a new one.”

Donghyuck beams, and rewards his very generous and very kind boyfriend with a peck on the lips. “Deal.”

/////

**HAECHAN CAM EP 0: SELF INTRO!**

The screen is black. There’s noise in the background— distant laughter and the clink of dishes against each other.

A hand pulls back from the lens, revealing a boy in his kitchen (going by the stove in the corner). He’s smiling sweetly, fiddling with his fringe with the hand not holding the camera. “Hello everyone!” He sings. “This is Haechan from Haechan Cam, which has— well, this is my first video, so let me change that—”

He covers the lens again, then pulls his hand back as if nothing had happened. “Okay! This is Haechan from Haechan Cam, which will aim to have a 37.5% viewer rating!” Cute little kaomojis burst onto the screen in pastel candy colors, all variations of cheering and happy. “This is my first video, so it isn’t going to be that long; I just wanted to introduce myself to all my lovely viewers.”

Somewhere in the background, someone says, “Isn’t the whole point of this that he doesn’t have any viewers yet?”

Haechan’s bubbly grin fades. “Just a moment,” he tells the camera. He sets it down on the counter, facing the stove and the wall. His footsteps (presumably) get fainter and fainter. “Yah,” he starts, before lowering his voice. His words aren’t audible, but his tone is— plaintive and annoyed. 

The response, is amused. “Why not? You said you were gonna introduce us anyway, why can’t they hear us?”

There’s a hiss, probably from Haechan, and a frazzled but pointed explanation only a few words of which are discernible. Something about timing, and respect for the craft. 

A laugh. “Okay, okay. Sorry.”

A moment later, Haechan’s footsteps approach again, and the camera gets picked up and turned in his hands until he’s once again visible, smile brilliant and camera-ready. “So where was I? So yeah, I’m Haechan, and I’m starting this Youtube channel because I realized something: I know a _lot_ of supernaturals, and all of them very different kinds, and people will likely be curious, right? About what it’s like to know them. So that’s why— drumroll please—” he bows his head slightly, waiting. A dot appears on screen. Another. One more. There’s a cricket noise edited in. He looks up at the camera, exasperated. “Wait, one more minute.”

He disappears off-camera again. There’s some bickering, but it cuts off after a few seconds, the footage clearly cut on purpose. “Okay!” Haechan says, coming back. “Drumroll!”

There’s a hesitant pause, but then the sound of hands rhythmically tapping against a table (or something).

“So!” The drumroll stops, accompanied by a muttered complaint that Haechan ignores. “So, I made this channel to introduce all of you to what it’s like to know all these magical people— starting from me, of course, your host, Haechan.” Haechan winks and does a little bow with a flourish of his hand. “My name means ‘ _Full Sun_ ,’” he says, enunciating the English words carefully. “Obviously because I’m so bright and sunny.” Haechan cups his cheek with one hand and tilting his head in an attempt to be cute. “And I’m 20 years old. I’m an empath, so I can sense and share in the feelings of the people around me.” His gaze flicks away for a moment, brow furrowing as he thinks (or pretends to; it looks a little put upon, the hum almost theatrical). “And, well, it’s not _technically_ part of my abilities, but I’m pretty good at recognizing other supernaturals by their emotions. They feel things a little differently than humans do unless they’re super recently turned or raised human.”

A disclaimer flashes on screen. It reads: _This doesn’t mean they don’t feel!!! Be nice at all times!!!_

A second disclaimer, in much smaller font, appears beneath: _*unless they’re assholes, then you can be an asshole back._

“Of course! I’m also the most handsome and lovable, so that’s practically another power!”

There’s a loud snort in the background. Two other people are laughing, one in quiet giggles, and another in full-blown, mocking cackling. 

Haechan glares in the direction of the voices, and he extends his hand to be out of frame, where he likely makes a rude gesture of some sort, because the laughter gets louder. With a sigh, Haechan turns back to the camera. “My roommates are being annoying, so unfortunately, that’s all the time we have today. Again, this has been Haechan from Haechan Cam, with soon to be 37.5% viewership. See you on the next episode! Bye-bye!”

Haechan waves his hand at the camera.

“Hey, hold on, roommate? I thought we were—”

The video ends.

/////

“I can’t believe you called us _roommates_ ,” Jaemin pouts, as he clicks around his computer to save, double-save, and triple-save the edited footage and then email it to Donghyuck for him to upload to his channel. “We’re _boyfriends._ ‘Roommates,’” he scoffs, playfully disdainful. “Ha. If that’s all we are maybe I won’t include you on tonight’s dinner date.”

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. “You don’t mean that.”

“Maybe I do. How do you know?”

“I’m an _empath_ , doofus.” He shoves at Jaemin’s shoulder. “You can’t pretend to be upset around me, it doesn’t work.”

Jaemin’s pouting intensifies, but it’s not like he can argue. Donghyuck’s right, as he usually is. 

Renjun would call bullshit on the last part, probably, but he’s a vampire not a mind-reader, so there’s no way he can.

So ha.

“So when are you posting this?” Jaemin asks, pushing his chair back from the desk and twirling it around to face Donghyuck. He leans back into it like it’s a throne, an eyebrow raised curiously. “And what do you plan to do for the next one?”

“I’m gonna post it tomorrow morning, probably, then I’ll do some SNS promo, you know,” Donghyuck says, scrolling through his Twitter timeline mindlessly. “The next video… I was thinking of starting with you guys.”

“All three of us? Sounds chaotic.”

Donghyuck and Jaemin turn to find Renjun in the doorway, smiling. A plastic bag dangles from his hand. “I brought us tteokbokki. Jeno’s already devouring his share. Do you want to take it in here, or—”

“We are _not_ eating in my room,” sniffs Jaemin, standing and shoving Donghyuck out the door. “I like my room clean and pest-free, thanks very much.”

“Then why’d you let Hyuck in?”

Donghyuck can feel the amusement almost as strongly as he hears it, sunshine gold and daffodil bright. He glares. “Fuck you.”

Renjun shrugs, but his cheeks and his aura flood with pink, and Donghyuck lets himself feel smug, even if he doesn’t show it. “If you want,” says Renjun, faking nonchalance. “But after we eat.”

“Oho?” says Jaemin, wiggling his eyebrows and grinning slimily. “Wow! Sexy!”

At the table, Jeno huffs out a laugh as the other three pull up seats. Jeno’s already set the table for them, it seems. Donghyuck knows it wasn’t Renjun, or he wouldn’t have carried the food with him to the room. He’s practical that way.

“So, what’s the video look like?” asks Jeno, around a mouthful of food. He’s curious enough that it pokes gently at the edges of Donghyuck’s consciousness; curiosity is one of those weird emotions Donghyuck’s never been able to assign a color to, but he feels it all the same, like a child tugging on his sleeve. 

“Cute,” says Jaemin, proudly beaming. “My editing skills are top-notch, so it’s simple, but adorable.”

Donghyuck clears his throat. Pointedly.

Jaemin cuts him a glance. “Mmmm… and I guess you’re a little cute too.”

“I’m the cutest one here!” Donghyuck protests.

“No, that’s Injunnie,” Jaemin says matter-of-factly. “Look at his face!” He coos, reaching for Renjun’s cheek. Renjun, for his part, grimaces and fends off Jaemin’s advances as much as he’s able.

They’re so happy Donghyuck can’t help but feel it too, amplified tenfold by his own emotions. He grins, and stuffs some tteokbokki in his mouth to hide it.

Across from him, Jeno shuffles away from the flailing limbs of their boyfriends, and only when he’s safely out of the danger zone does he snicker, watching them with his crescent moon eyes and twinkling star smile. He’s so, so enamored, and Donghyuck is, too. 

They all are.

/////

**HAECHAN CAM EP 1: MEETING MY VAMPIRE BOYFRIEND?**

The first shot is of someone’s chest. Clad in an old band T-shirt that’s seen better days, it hangs loose, revealing a tanned throat, a sharp collarbone. The camera shakes as it’s picked up, and then—

“This is Haechan from Haechan Cam with 37.5% ratings!” says Haechan, beaming. “I was not expecting all the love on my first video— thanks!”

Confetti bursts on screen, and a little gif of a cheering bear pops up in the lower right. 

Haechan looks mostly casual. His hair has obviously been done, falling in his eyes in soft waves of caramel, and he has eyeshadow and liner on, but he’s in what looks to be his pajamas. “So today is officially episode 1 of Haechan Cam, and I thought we should probably start with the most important people in my life aside from myself and my parents.” He pauses. “Sorry siblings, you rank below them.” He gives a little finger gun to the camera, and a matching kaomoji floats above his hand. “Sucks to be you.”

“Anyway!” he chirps, moving somewhere. “It’s time to meet my boyfriends!” He pauses again, looks seriously into the camera. “Yes, I’m gay. Yes, I’m polyamorous—” a definition pops up on screen, flashing slowly— “if that’s a problem, well,” Haechan’s smile is saccharine and sharp. “You can just go, the back button is up there.” He waves a hand toward the upper left of the screen.

That warning made, he turns around, and behind him, the background shifts from a dim hallway to a sunshine-y living room. The kitchen is visible further in the distance, what looks like a fridge obvious in one corner of the frame. A figure crosses behind Haechan and pulls that open as Haechan announces, “Well, actually, we’re only meeting one of my boyfriends today. I'm giving them each a video so they feel special.”

“We _are_ special!” calls a voice, and a little subtitle pops up alongside some slashes on the side of the screen, as if to indicate where the speaker is.

“Yeah, especially Jaemin over here,” says another voice, dry, but definitely amused, accompanied by another caption in a different color. “He’s definitely… a _special_ friend.”

“Boyfriend!” whines Jaemin. “At least say _boyfriend_ if you’re gonna bully me!”

Haechan’s been frozen, head twisted slightly to watch this conversation happen. Now, he looks at the camera, completely deadpan. “Okayyyyy,” he drawls, starting to move again. “So today, I think we’ll start with…” he flops down onto a couch, between two other boys who smile and wave at the camera. “My vampire boyfriend!”

The boy on Haechan’s left immediately perks up, running a graceful hand through his bleached hair. The roots are showing, a little, grown out and needing a retouch; the ends are colored a lovely shade of lavender that clashes with his dark orange sweater, but he somehow makes it work.

When he grins at the camera, his eyes practically sparkle, and he opens his mouth, presumably to introduce himself, when—

The camera jerks suddenly to the right, as Haechan tugs it closer so the “vampire boyfriend” is cut out of the frame. The other boy starts laughing, tentatively at first as he registers what happened, and then louder, the force of it enough to make him curl forward, slapping at Haechan’s leg twice. “Sike!” Haechan grins, a little edge to it. “He’s human. This is Jaemin, everyone.”

“Hi,” says Jaemin, still giggling a little.

“Yah.” An angry kaomoji appears in the upper left, along with the words: _Injunnie is an angry baby fox._ “D— Haechan-ah.”

Haechan’s smile widens and he flutters his lashes at the boy now off-camera. “Yes, Renjunnie?”

“I’ll bite you,” Renjun threatens.

“No you won’t,” sniffs Haechan. “You don’t like my blood.” He sounds sulky, almost. A kaomoji pops up above his head.

Definitely sulky.

“It’s not that I don’t like it, you just give me weird after-effects! Stupid empathy—”

“You have empathy anyway! All people do!”

“Not sensitive enough to pick up on what everyone in a 10-meter radius is feeling, like it or not!”

Jaemin glances at them, and then back at the camera. He smiles serenely. “Just another peaceful day in our household.”

“Go away,” says Haechan. “I have a very important guest to interview. I’ll talk to you next time.”

A heavy sigh. “Fine then. This isn’t over. Next time—”

“I got it, I got it, bye bye Renjun!”

Another heavier, more annoyed sigh. There’s a laugh that isn’t Jaemin’s or Renjun’s in the background, then a voice calling for Renjun. Renjun’s footsteps fade away.

Haechan slings an arm around Jaemin’s shoulders, expression sunny. “So, Jaemin-ssi, as the only ordinary human in this relationship, what’s it like living with three supernaturals?”

Jaemin replies, laughter still in his voice, “It’s definitely interesting. I love my boyfriends so much, but… it’s serious, you know? The things you have to get used to.”

“Ah, yes. What was the hardest thing?”

“Hardest?” Jaemin ducks his head and wiggles his eyebrows. “Nothing’s hard when it’s true love.” 

Haechan blinks slowly at him.

He blows a kiss, unbothered by the lack of reaction.

“‘Kay then… So. Hardest part?”

Jaemin snickers, and then turns back to the camera. “Should I do one per person?”

“Sure, why not.”

“Should I start with Haechan?” Jaemin smirks.

Haechan twists his head to stare. Jaemin doesn’t waver. Three dots appear on-screen above their heads, one by one. “Okay,” says Haechan eventually, cocking his head to one side. “Try it.”

Jaemin pretends to think. “I can only choose one?”

Haechan grins, obviously fake, as Jaemin cackles breathlessly. “Oh, our Jaeminnie— he only lives for today, huh?” He slaps twice at Jaemin’s arm, hard enough to make him wince. “So. Funny.”

“I know I am,” says Jaemin, breaking into a smile. “No, okay, I’ll be honest now. Promise.”

“Okay, go ahead, Jaemin-ssi.”

Jaemin opens his mouth, looking distinctly offended at the address. He pouts, but Haechan does nothing but gesture with his free hand to continue. “Mostly, it’s getting used to the fact that I can’t hide much anymore,” he admits, turning back to the camera. “I’m the kind of person that doesn’t like to burden others, you see, so I smile a lot even when I don’t feel well. But since Haechannie can sense what I’m feeling, he calls me out.”

“He was a little snappish about it at first, but it’s not like I can control it,” confides Haechan to the camera. “I tamp it down as much as I can as it is.”

“I know.” Jaemin plants a noisy smooch on Haechan’s cheek, who grimaces, but makes no move to wipe it off, even if he starts muttering that Jaemin didn’t have to be so sloppy, he doesn’t need saliva on his cheek—

The footage begins to fast forward, the rest of Haechan’s rant coming out incomprehensible and squeaky with the timelapse.

“So what about Jeno and Renjun?” asks Haechan, as the video slows back to normal. He combs his hair back away from his face, and Jaemin’s eyes track the movement, so full of adoration it seems like it should be private, somehow.

“Jeno’s just strong,” says Jaemin, last word trailing into a smitten sigh. “So strong.”

“How is that a problem?”

Jaemin’s dopey smile falls. “He breaks things at least three times a week. I had to get a new phone the other day—” That said, he fishes his phone out of his pocket and brandishes it at the camera like a weapon. “Do you see this case?” It’s thick and bulky, rubber-encased and heavy-seeming. “I spent like… let’s just say my bank account is _not_ happy. And it’s so ugly, but if I don’t do this, Jeno might crush it again.”

“Hey! I would not! It was an accident!” someone— presumably Jeno— yells from the background.

“Honey,” Jaemin sighs. “I love you, but you would. Accident or not.”

Haechan snorts. “Okay! And what about Renjun?”

Someone clears his throat off-camera. “Speak carefully, Jaemin-ah,” Renjun says brightly.

“Carefully?”

“Yes.”

“Ah. Then I need more time to think.”

“ _Yah_.”

Haechan giggles, clearly delighted, and so terribly fond it’s impossible to miss.

Jaemin grins at him, wiggling his eyebrows, and then says, trying to smother his laughter, “Okay, okay.” He takes a deep breath, and his voice comes out much steadier, though his expression is still bright and playful. “Okay. So Renjun— I had to get really used to concealer, because sometimes I let him feed on me, right, like when he forgets to drop by the blood bank or needs extra energy, or that one time Jeno accidentally gripped the last bag too hard and it— PFFT—” Jaemin splays his hand out, miming an explosion— “Y’know? Also when we—”

Haechan cuts him off with a harsh clearing of his throat, and Jaemin turns to the camera and winks. “We’ll stop there so this channel doesn’t get a higher rating.” He shoots a finger gun, and Haechan just sighs heavily.

“These marks,” says Jaemin, twisting his head to one side to bare his throat. He taps at a dark bruise on one side, and two scabbed over puncture wounds. “Take forever to go away. It’s not usually this bad, honestly, but _someone_ waited too long to say anything about being hungry, and—”

“I had exams!” yelps Renjun in the distance. “I was occupied!”

“Yeah, but you could remember how to keep yourself alive at least—”

“I’ve been dead for a century, you doofus!”

Haechan rolls his eyes and hops to his feet, leaving the room entirely. He shuts a door behind him, and smiles sunnily at the camera. “Okay cut! This has been Haechan Cam with 37.5% viewer ratings, thank you very much!”

The screen blacks out.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twitter @withusangie to chat nct!


End file.
